A1SaudiArabia.com

 A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses’ wife instead:

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A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally typed wrong e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

 

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Hypothetical situation where 20 executives board an airplane and are told that the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature pilot-less technology: It is an un-crewed aircraft.

Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company’s software is running the aircraft’s automatic pilot system. Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.

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SOCIALISM: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.
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COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you someÂÂ
milk.
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FASCISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you someÂÂ
milk.
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NAZISM: You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.
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BUREAUCRATISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one,ÂÂ
milks the other and throws the milk away…
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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.ÂÂ
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on
the  income.
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AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force theÂÂ
other to  produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to
analyze  why the  cow dropped dead.
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A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you  want
three  cows.
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A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they areÂÂ
one-tenth the size of an  ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever  cow  cartoon image called Cowkimon and market
them World-Wide.
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A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they liveÂÂ
for  100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
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AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don’t know where theyÂÂ
are. You break for lunch.
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A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn youÂÂ
have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count
them  again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open
another bottle of  vodka.
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A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. YouÂÂ
charge others for storing them.
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A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milkingÂÂ
them. You  claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the
newsman who reported the numbers.
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AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.
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A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.
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AN EGYPTIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are voting for Mobarak.
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A LEBANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both die suddenly. You searchÂÂ
for the Truth.

One day while walking down the street a highly successful Human Resources Manager was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

“Welcome to Heaven ,” said St. Peter. “Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we’ve never once had a Human Resources Manager make it this far and we’re not really sure what to do with you.”

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*If You Get Caught Sleeping at Your Desk*

 

1. They told me at the blood bank this might happen.

2. This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time
management course you sent me to.

3. Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper.

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